When More is Better

I like working at my desk. I mean at work. I prefer working in the office rather than some computer training room in the basement of a hospital. My desk, my computer, my space. But today, I had to leave my office to go work in the aforementioned basement training room. Alone. "Why?" do you ask? So I could work on 2 computers at once. One just isn't enough.

Its About Frickin Time

Miss Canada won the Miss Universe pageant. Are beauty pageants still politically correct? I mean, I personally don't care. If that's what they want to do, go right ahead and do it. But there's got to be some group out there that is protesting this whole beauty pageant thing. I heard the network wanted to turn Miss America into a reality show with the Big Show as the finale. I don't know... Unless there's an undercover FBI agent and some conspiracy to kill someone from the show, I just don't see it as interesting.

Current Thoughts

I've noticed that during the time I was back working on the ward (April 5-May13) I've had a few more blog entries than usual. My guess is that now that I'm back at my desk job the entries will start slowing down again.

Thanks to everyone on my old ward for the DVD rack and the going-away party. I couldn't actually make it to the party, but on my last day they bought me a cake and sang "For he's a jolly good fellow."

This hot weather makes me want to buy a portable air conditioner. I say this every year but one of these days I'm gonna really do it. Maybe this year...

I washed my car yesterday. This is the second time that I've washed my car (I've had it washed by other people 3 or 4 times) in 3 years. Thanks to everyone that's ever washed my car for me. Its a tough job. Y'know, it actually looks pretty decent when it's clean.

Is it better to put your iPod on a lanyard around your neck, in a belt-clip at your waist, in an armband on your bicep, or should it just go in your pocket? I haven't quite made up my mind on this one yet. I'm going with the pocket right now.

Why.

No, I'm not asking "why?" I'm telling you why. Why do I blog? Its been about 18 months now and I'm still writing my thoughts down to be published over the internet. The internet, for God's sake! The place where porn rules and the home of the anonymous community. Why do I express my thoughts here, you ask? Because. Because I'm an opinionated jerk that doesn't care what other people think. I blog because I'm vain and I want other people to see things my way. I blog because I just want everyone else to know what I'm thinking when I don't say it out loud. But most of all, I blog because... well, I don't know. I guess its kinda fun.

I'm like a Poor, Dumb Bill Gates

Last week I was sitting at a coffee shop listening to my iPod. I reached into my pocket and adjusted the volume and track when my Blackberry started buzzing. I pulled it out and started writing an email back to my co-worker. As I was writing this email, my cell phone rang. When I heard my phone ring, I thought, "Oh man, I'm a geek." iPod, Blackberry, cell phone - all I need is a notebook computer and a pocket protector.

Thank God its Not Over

I just read that George Lucas wants to make another Star Wars movie. The new movie will introduce a whole new cast, except for Yoda, and will take place 100 years before Episode 1. "Star Wars 0" will have Yoda as the hero of the movie. I personally think he should go back a little further so he can tell more stories about the Sith Lords.

Back to Work

Last Tuesday I went back to my job with the IS dept. Since I've been gone, the department has gone through a bit of a re-org. My group is now called Health Informatics rather than E-Health. I'm still trying to catch up on things, but Brian hasn't been shy about giving me more and more work to do. Seems as though I'll be pretty busy over the next few weeks. We have another hospital going Live on my birthday weekend so between now and about mid-June I'll be drowning in work.

Stuff Brian and I do at work to stop us from going crazy:

1. arrange meetings with people we don't like on Tuesdays. This way, when we get off the phone with them we can say "C U Next Tuesday!"
2. make comments under our breath about dumbasses that will guarantee a very warm spot in hell.
3. teach classes together so that we can have contests for who can freestyle the training script the best.
4. create new standards on a daily basis without consulting anyone but each other.

Movie Review

Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith with Natalie Portman, Hayden Christiansen, Ewan McGregor, and Yoda

Good shit, man. Good shit.

Top 5 Least Popular Superheroes

5. Constipation Man
4. Womanman
3. Usedcar SalesMan
2. Immigration Boy
1. The Blind Cripple

thanks to The Keeper of Lists for this one

Funnies

Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A: Ask your mom.

Q: How do you know you're leading a sad life?
A: When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Let's just be friends."

Q: Are birth control pills deductible?
A: Only if they don't work.

Q: What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
A: If we don't get some support soon, people are going to think we're nuts.

Q: Mom's have Mother's Day, Father's have Father's Day. What do single guys have?
A: Palm Sunday

Q. What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A. A whore sleeps with everybody at the party, and a bitch sleeps with everybody at the party except you.

Q. What is the biggest problem for an atheist?
A. No one to talk to during orgasm.

Q. How can you tell which is the head nurse?
A. The one with the dirty knees.

Q. A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade: Who has the biggest breasts? A. The blonde, because she's 18.

Preliminary Movie Review

Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith with Hayden Christiansen, Natalie Portman, and Yoda

Okay, I haven't seen it yet, but even if it sucks it'll be good. Only a Star Wars fan would understand what I mean by that.

Movie Review

Spanglish with Adam Sandler, Paz Vega, and Tea Leoni.

It made me laugh, it made me cry... oh wait, that was my last review. I liked this movie too.

The End

Yesterday was my last day on the ward. It was quite sad for me actually. They bought me an ice cream cake and next thursday, there's a bigger gathering for all the people leaving the ward. Even though I don't want to work there anymore, I'll miss it because I work with some great people there and there's always something interesting going on. But, in the interest of personal development and advancement of my career, I've moved on to bigger and better things.

Top Ten Gross Things in the Hospital

1. Cellulitis - when the skin is all maroon-coloured and bubbly-looking. ugh.
2. Unknown Fluids - sometimes, when you're standing at the bedside and you realize the floor is wet or the handrail is wet, you just don't want to know. I run off and wash my hands.
3. The Sound of coughers and hackers - y'know those people that start coughing and do their best to bring up a collection of alveoli? and they go at it for like, 10 minutes.
4. The Stuff coughers and hackers bring up - sputum is my weakness. Superman has green kryptonite, I have that disgusting yellowish, mucousy, gunk that makes me want to puke. usually I have to leave the room.
5. Body Fluids - I've lumped all body fluids together because it doesn't matter where it comes out of the body, its usually gross. A little bit of sweat is okay, but diaphoresis with bad B.O. is not. Stool, urine, and various forms of 'discharge' are all things I won't get within 10 feet of without gloves on my hands, a spare set of gloves in my pocket, a protective gown nearby (sometimes), and a sink with a lot of soap nearby.
6. Smells - that aroma you catch as you walk down the hallway and you know that the patient in one of the nearby rooms has C.diff.
7. Food - no offence to the kitchen staff, but there is absolutely no way to prepare meals for 600 people 3 times/day and make it look appetizing. If I'm ever hospitalized, I'm going to force my family to bring food in for me.
8. Bedsores - see, what happens is the skin breaks down because of the pressure from a bone or something. Bedsores are more common on the tailbone or the hipbone. They are not a pretty site and you don't ever, and I mean ever, want to have one. I've seen sores so deep you can see all the layers of tissue including the bone. And don't tell me it might be infected and smells. I'll have to go home sick.
9. Poor Hygiene - for some reason, people seem to think that being the hospital makes them exempt from the need for good personal hygiene. Hygiene is not simply to smell good, its for good health. Don't tell me you can't wash your hands because you broke your ankle, and don't try to tell me you don't need to wipe your ass because you can't reach it.
10. Vomit - this is the all-time worst. Everything about it, the sound people make when they're puking, the way they heave as they puke, the look on their face when they are puking, smell of the puke, the consistency of the puke - EVERYTHING. When my patients puke, I go get them gravol, or a wet towel to clean up with, or a new gown, or something. I'll say anything to get out of that damn room. It takes everything I've got to not get sick at times like this.

Movie Review

Finding Neverland with Johnny Depp, Kate Winslet, Dustin Hoffman, and introducing Freddie Highmore

It made me laugh, it made me cry. Good stuff.

Everybody Has a Story Part 5

Last week I was working a night shift. In the morning, I had to stay an extra hour to help out the day staff because they were short staffed. All I really did was hand out some meds and help get patients ready for the day. But, there was this one patient that just didn't seem right. The week before he was a patient of mine and he was doing great after his surgery. That morning, he just seemed a little... off. Anyway, I went home, got some sleep and came back to work for another night shift. I found out that this man had died during the day. Apparently, after about 3pm he just got worse and worse and ended up dying at about 7pm. He was such a nice man too. Easy-going, jovial, good-natured. I don't know if he has children or grandchildren, but I know he was survived by his wife. I hope she is doing okay.

Special Day

For all the mother's out there: Happy Mother's Day.

Me - sort of

I know I mentioned googling yourself before, but I did it again:

http://www.siu.edu/~siupress/titles/s01_titles/delapaz_houses.htm

http://pugnaciouspinoy.blogspot.com

Code Orange!

Last night when I got to work, the alarms were going off throughout the hospital. I took the stairs up and when I got the ward, I hear the overhead announcement: "Your attention please, Code Orange. Your attention please, Code Orange. All day staff are to remain on the premises." Let's see, what the hell is a code orange? Oh crap, its a disaster! Seems as though a water main burst and flooded the emergency dept, the medical imaging dept, and Central Processing. All the patients in emerg were either sent home or transferred to another hospital. Emerg was under a foot of water, with some parts of the floor up to 3 feet! I even heard the elevator shaft had 15 of water in it! Well, all surgeries were cancelled for the night and for today and emerg was closed all night and probably for most of today. The clean-up is going to suck for all those involved. I heard emerg got pretty messed up.

Sometimes its Good, Sometimes... not so much

I know that I've really been saying that I hate working on the ward and that I can't wait to get back to my desk job, but there are times when the ward has its nice moments. On Tuesday I got to work and there was a gift bag sitting there for me. I opened it up and there was a card and a little angel ornament from a patient I had last week. "For service above and beyond the call of duty--Thanks." She was a very nice woman that had a hard time after her surgery. This is my favourite part of nursing. You may not be able to change the world, but you might be able to change one person's world. Even though I was busy that day, I still had a good day.

The next day, however, wasn't so good. I was running non-stop from the moment I got there until 3 in the afternoon. The last 4 hours settle down, but I was so far behind at that point I was still pretty busy. I couldn't wait to go home. Days like that make me pray the next week and a half go by fast.

Movie Review

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy with Martin Freeman, Mos Def, Sam Rockwell, and Zooey Deschanel

If you've ever read the book, the movie does it justice. I thought it was pretty good. If you don't get the jokes, you have to read the book.