Holy Crap!

As all of you probably know, we're expecting. "Expecting what?" you ask? Babies, of course. Why does "expecting" always mean you're expecting a baby? What if you're just expecting the delivery of a new sofa? "Yes, we're expecting and we're very excited. The new sofa gets delivered Tuesday." Anyway, you read correctly above. We're expecting babies. As in Twins. Crazy, huh? Not crazy like running around in circles screaming, but crazy like climbing mt everest without a warm coat. I have to admit this throws a monkey wrench into all my plans. I was going to buy a little 2-seater sports car and move us all into a little downtown condo. Now it looks like its minivan and home in the burbs. Oh wait, that didn't change my plans at all. never mind.

Smile!

Yesterday I bought a new camera: the Canon Powershot SD800IS. You'll have to look it up yourself because I'm too lazy to make a link. Originally, I was looking for the SD900 because I wanted a 10 megapixel camera but I traded 3 megapixels for image stabilization. I know what you're thinking: "you didn't need 10 megapixels anyway." Well, sure maybe I didn't but that doesn't mean you shouldn't get it. I believe that when it comes to technology, you should always get the most that you can afford. When people ask me to help them find a new computer I always ask "how much can you spend?" If you say $1000, then I'll look for computers that are $1000 not $600. You'll never be ahead of the game when it comes to technology because there's always something new so by buying the best you can now will mean your stuff will become outdated in 10 months instead of 5. But I guess its all a tradeoff. I chose less megapixels for the image stabilization. I'll post some pictures after my vacation.

Merry Christmas

We're spending Christmas in San Francisco with Celia's sister and we'll be back on Boxing Day. Have a Merry Christmas and best wishes for the holiday season to you and your loved ones.

Edelweiss

I just watched The Sound of Music again. When did this movie come out? 1965? After the movie we looked up the characters on Wikipedia. Apparently, the actors that played the kids are all still alive and kicking. Liesl used to be so hot. Now: not so much. Anyway, I still think its a romantic movie. Not just the love story but the whole stand-up-for-your-convictions way that the Captain handled his family. No joining the nazis, giving up everything for freedom, etc etc. If you've only watched it on TV, you should watch the widescreen version. Trust me, its better.

Happy Belated

I forgot to celebrate the third anniversary of my blog. It was November 25th, 2003 when I started writing all this crap. The really funny part is that all you guys have been wasting your time reading it! Seriously, I don't have any kind of insight and I'm not all that funny. I mostly just talk about myself and useless crap. Anyway, happy birthday! I have an idea for 2007, but you'll have to wait to see the new feature.

New stuff I'm working on (this isn't the new 2007 feature, moron. it's still 2006):
Adding labels to all my old posts. As of right now, I have something like 542 entries that I have to label. It might take a while but after all that work, it'll be so much easier to go back and read all my deep, insightful movie and book reviews or go back and play all the 'Who Said That?' games all over again.

Save the Cheerleader...

Okay, I'm hooked. I haven't been this hooked since last season's Grey's Anatomy (which I'm finding kinda dull nowadays). You have to watch Heroes. Now that's some good shit. Don't even tell me you think it looks cheesy because it's not. Okay okay, its a little farfetched but its so exciting.

Synopsis:
A bunch of people have super powers and something is going to happen that brings them all together to save the world. How do they save the world? Save the cheerleader.

Top Ten Things I Want for Christmas

In no particular order:

1. World Peace
2. New helmet with built in headphones
3. Oakley Crowbar goggles
4. Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
5. Nintendo Wii/PS3
6. Black Socks
7. Underwear - either boxers or boxer briefs
8. Logitech G7 or MX Revolution mouse
9. new computer (actually, just a processor and video card - I can take care of the rest myself
10. Canon SD900 digital camera

Go World Peace!

Victoria's Secret Fashion Show

Yeah, that's hot.

Again, the Job gets Stressful

I found out the other day that I have to do a presentation. Presentations are no big deal. I do them all the time. I teach classes on how to use the software on a regular basis. This presentation, however, is a little different. I have to present to all the executives in the Authority. I'm talking about standing in front of the CEO, CFO, CIO, a whole pile of VP's, directors, managers, etc, and do my best to sound the least bit intelligent. I don't know why I'm nervous about it, it's not like they can fire me. And whether or not I do a good job won't really affect anything about my work. I just don't want to sound like an idiot. You know, gotta make our department look good. Okay, all those people might not be there, but this is a bigger deal than I'm used to.

What's That From?

I have to salute a movie that has given us some great quotes. I have to admit I enjoyed this movie but unfortunately its missing huge explosions and naked women. Oh well, good movies don't have to have it all.

"Show me the money!"
"You had me at hello."
"Help me help you."
"You complete me."

If you say any of these quotes, everyone - and I mean everyone will know what you're talking about.

Another Top 5

Top 5 Funniest Shows on TV:

1. Family Guy
2. Scrubs
3. Most Extreme Elimination Challenge
4. The Simpsons
5. Ellen

Who Said That? Level 6

"No man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the fuck a Quarter Pounder is."

Superstar

Looks like old KFed's concert was a smashing success. After begging to stop it from being cancelled he was able to fill 300 seats out of the 1500 available. I almost feel bad for the guy. At first, he was the lucky chump that nailed Britney Spears. Then he became the deadbeat dad and husband. Then he became the loser that had his car taken away by his wife. Then he turned into a rap "artist". Now he's this sad little pathetic dude that probably cried after his concert. I really feel bad for him. Sort of.

Let it Snow!!

It snowed on Cypress Mountain the other day. 32 cm!! That's one foot for all you people that still live in the stone age. They expect to open at the end of the month. I'd like to see another 100 cm before I go, but I'm just itching to go. I bought new gloves a couple weeks ago. My old ones were starting to wear at the fingertips and I noticed my fingers were getting cold and wet. All I need now is a new helmet and pair of goggles (Christmas gifts hopefully!).

Movie Review

Strange Than Fiction with Will Ferrell and Dustin Hoffman

I thought it was brilliant.

Shut Up!!!

Britney finally filed for divorce from KFed. Looks like Whitney finally talked to her and told she should lose the loser and become the sexy little tramp schoolgirl again. I doubt Whitney told her to be a sexy little tramp schoolgirl but you get the idea. Actually, I doubt Whitney talked to her at all but Britney rhymes with Whitney so maybe they were just on the same wavelength. I read somewhere that Britney wasn't going to ask for alimony from Special K. That's too bad for her because I think I see his new CD skyrocketing any day now.

What's Eating Gilbert Grape?

I'm not perfect. Actually, I'm far from it. I'm kinda lazy, not really very smart, a little irresponsible, I don't make a lot of money, and I'm not famous, and I don't see myself suddenly becoming famous in the future. I live a pretty average life. This has been me for the past 32 years. Why do people expect anything different? Why is it okay for some people to do things differently and make their own decisions in life but not okay for me? When will I be allowed to do what I want? Everyone else seems to be allowed to bitch and scream about this, but when I do it, I'm being immature. And why do I still let people make me feel like I'm 17 years old again?

Fright Night

Last night we went to Fright Night at Playland. We got some free tickets from Celia's friend so it was actually pretty cheap. $10 for parking, no door charge ($50 value), $40 in games (they're all scams), and corn dogs, smokies, churros, and cotton candy made for a very entertaining night. We couldn't go on any rides and we attempted one of the haunted houses but the lineups weren't worth the thrills. To be honest, it wasn't even that scary. There were too many people walking through the haunted house to make it scary. Maybe for children or if you were walking through alone then it would be scary.

Save Your Money

If you want to open an ING savings account (3.5% interest), let me know. I'll refer you and you get some free money (so do I).

Sonuva...

I just noticed that the titles in my sidebar don't line up. Why the hell didn't anyone tell me this? Now I can't the damn things to line up properly.

That's Just Me

I hate hate hate it when people put food in their mouths and then open their mouths to show you the chewed up food. It makes me want to puke.

Who Said That? Level 5

"True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend... "

That's Just Me

My desk at work is very neat and tidy. I put everything away before I leave for the day and everything has its place.

My desk at home is a fucking pigsty.

Dreams

Reading my sister's blog reminded me of something that happened a couple years ago. I used to have a roommate that had a cat. I actually liked the cat because she was easy to take care of because she didn't need walking, didn't need constant attention, and was cute to have around. Well we used to sleep with the door slightly ajar otherwise Nala would scratch at it until someone let her in (then she would come in, look around and then leave like she just wanted to come in and see what was going on). Anyway, Nala would sometimes jump up on the bed and sleep on the pillow beside me or if Kerri had left for work already would just bug me until I got up. Anyway, one night I was having a dream that Nala was walking on my pillow and waving her tail in my face so I pushed her away and yelled, "Nala, stop that!" The next morning when I got up I realized that it wasn't Nala, it was Celia's hair tickling my face and I had shoved her head away! Sorry, babe.

Just an Update

It's been a while, huh? What have I been up to? None of your damn business. Just kidding. Well, not entirely, but I don't mean to sound like an a-hole. Anyway, I'll tell you what I'm doing now.

Today I attended my first meeting for this new project I'm working on at work and wow what a timekiller. Four hour meetings just kill me. I'd rather go to the dentist. Don't get me wrong, the meeting was necessary, but holy crap this project seems like it will never get off the ground with all the bickering and "discussions" going on. The next 6 months at work will be interesting...

I just got a new muffler for my car. I've needed a new muffler for about 3 months now but I finally got it done and my car is nice and quiet. Next: new tires.

Bed update: the king size bed we bought fucking rocks. We don't crowd each other anymore and Celia can roll over without knocking me in the face.

Has anyone else had a problem recently with their MSN Messenger? For a while I couldn't log in and it would just say "signing on" and the msn dude would spin around forever. I fixed it with the help of some website. Apparently it was some bug. Don't ask me for the address, just google "can't log into msn messenger".

Last week I was on vacation and did absolutely nothing. It was great. I slept in, played on my computer all day and vegged out for a week. I haven't had any real time off work since January so it was much-needed. The problem now is that I hate waking up early for work.

Coming Soon

Thanksgiving Weekend.

Whistler.

Turkey Sale.

Up to 70% off.

Who wants to go?

Book Review

The Sweet Hereafter by Russell Banks

It was supposed to be this really good book, but I thought it was just blah. No one gets sued. There, I just ruined the book for you.

Revisiting the Past

I posted this a couple years ago but I re-read it and thought it was pretty funny:

Shit Happens

Kevin + Bobby = 4 useless careers.

There was a time when I refused to post pictures here. Why? Because my blog isn't about showing you the picture album of my life, its about me saying whatever the hell I feel like saying. Originally, I didn't even plan on putting a comment section so if someone didn't like what I was saying there would be no way for them to leave me a "i-don't-agree-with-you" message for me. Why did I eventually put pictures and comments in? A) just to see if I could, B) to see who would actually leave comments, and C) vanity. I just wanted to get some feedback from my loyal readers. To everyone that has been reading this since the beginning, I'm glad you stuck around and didn't abandon me like Whitney did to Bobby. Then again, I wasn't getting you to do coke and making you bail me out of jail. Also, I wasn't cheating on you either. Thanks for being so loyal. Now, all we have to do is get that other copycat-career-killing-husband to leave his wife. Then Britney will be back on top.

Favourites

Favourite Curses:

1. Mothafucka!
2. Sonuvabitch!

Favourite Taunts:

1. Sucka!!
2. Ya like that? Huh? Ya like it?
   

The Bacon Number

The Bacon Number is the degree of separation any person will have with Kevin Bacon.

eg, Billy Dee Williams was in Giant Steps (1992) with Don McKellar
Don McKellar was in Where the Truth Lies (2005) with Kevin Bacon

Check out The Oracle of Bacon for any actor you want to try this on.

Top Five

Top Five Favourite Coffee Shops:

1. Tim Horton's
2. Starbucks
3. ...
4. ...
5. ...

Ya, I pretty much only like these two. Where I work, I have neither nearby. Waa.

Who Said That? Level 4

This is a tough one:

"I appreciate this whole seduction thing you've got going on here, but let me give you a tip: I'm a sure thing."

Happy Birthdays

This past week was Dinah and Gillian's birthdays. Last weekend we went out and celebrated their birthdays with this other dude, but I don't really know him. I met him for a second but I don't really remember him. Anyway, happy birthday to them. I know the picture has Vanessa in it too, and I know it wasn't her birthday, but I didn't want to post a picture of a dude I don't know so I put this one up instead.

Who Said That? Level 3

This one is a little harder. No hints either.

"Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder."

I miss...

I've been in my job for two and a half years and I'm starting to miss something from my old job at the hospital. Is it the patient care aspect of my profession? Is the the feeling of satisfaction from helping those in need? Or is it the feeling of self-worth from knowing it is a noble career, long entrenched in the history of western civilization? I think I'd have to say none of the above. What I really miss is my five days off between sets. I used to work 12hr shifts, 2 days, 2 nights and then 5 days off. Sure my days off changed every week but it was still predictable and it was so much easier to get things done on a Tuesday afternoon than it is to do it on a Saturday afternoon.

Small World

Last week we went Saigon. You know, that karaoke place on Broadway. Anyway, we met up with a bunch of Celia's friends and since they go to Saigon all the time they were buddy-buddy with the owner. They introduced me and we all had a good time. Later that night, the owner comes by and asks me my last name and who my parents are. Hm, weird but okay. I tell him and he says, "don't you remember me? I'm your uncle." Oh man, this guy is my mom's cousin (mind you, not super close or anything. I've only met him once before). So now everyone is joking around about how my tito is keeping his eye on me and how he should now let everyone drink for free because we're all family. Anyway, we closed the place and didn't get home till almost 4am. Fun times.

Crikey!

Say this in a thick australian accent: "Take a look at this. This is the most dangerous [insert name of animal here] on the planet. No one, and I mean no one should get this close to it. I'm just going to try and pick it up."

Remember Steve Irwin "Crocodile Hunter"? He would play with poisonous snakes, pick up deadly scorpions, wrestle 12 ft crocodiles, and chase down hyenas without getting so much as a scratch. He was invincible. Then one day he decides to go swimming with some stingray. Although stingray have a barb at the end of their tail that can be quite painful if you're jabbed, fatalities are very rare. This barb, however, jabbed Steve Irwin "Crocodile Hunter" in the chest, puncturing his heart and ultimately killing him at the young age of 44.

Let us all mourn the loss of the bravest man I've ever seen on TV.

Who Said That? Level 2

"This is a really volcanic ensemble you're wearing, it's really marvelous!"

hint: same movie, same character "His name is Blane? That's a major appliance, that's not a name!"

TV Review

Duets hosted by Wayne Brady

Damn that Wayne Brady is funny! Oh, and the singing is aight.

I Can't Wait Till Sept 2

So on Sunday we decided to stop by Sleep Country to see what they had in the way of mattresses. Apparently, that's what they sell. My brother and his wife recommended we go there and I didn't know of any other place to go anyway. If you make one comment about Costco, I'm coming over to kick your ass. Anyway, we get there and the first thing we do is lay down on the most expensive mattress in the store. for a queen size set it was something like $4000. Yeah, screw that. We tried out the tempurpedic thing which I actually liked more than I thought I would, but it was $3000 or something like that. Yeah, screw that too. Then we asked the guy about the Sleep number beds. You know, the ones where you can adjust the softness/firmess on either side of the mattress. I was thoroughly unimpressed by this bed and, as it turns out, Celia and I had the same number anyway. We decided on a regular old mattress, no bells or whistles.

Option 1:
Some queensize bed with a great price. Very comfortable.

Option 2:
Another queensize bed with a slightly higher price. Even more comfortable.

So with these two options what do we do? We go with option 2 but in a king size. With 2 tempurpedic contoured pillows. This bed is going to fill the whole bedroom but I don't care. Its getting delivered on Saturday and I can't wait!

A World of My Own

I hear that mp3 players are causing early hearing loss in teens. Well its a good thing I'm not a teenager anymore because I'd hate it if my iPod made my hearing worse than it already is. Seriously though, I'd like to make a comment about my iPod. It fucking rocks! When I first got it, I didn't think I'd actually use it that often, but after having one for roughly a year and a half, I have to say it has changed my life. Not like I-won-the-lottery-and-moved-to-el-salvador changed my life, but rather it has given me privacy where privacy is limited. I work at a desk with about 7000 people around me and there's always people talking or walking around. When I put my iPod on, those people disappear and I can quietly hum away to Justin Timberlake or Chantal Kreveiakjdkazck (how the hell do you spell that?). Actually, at work I listen to a lot of classical music. It's not distracting and I don't try to sing along.

Who Said That?

For now on, I'm going have an ongoing game. I'm not keeping score, I'm not giving away prizes, and I'm not even going acknowledge right or wrong answers. What I will do, however, is quote a line from a movie and you have to guess who said it and what movie it's from. The quote may not be exact, but it should be pretty damn close.

We'll start easy:

"One look?! One look?!"

hint: same actor, same movie "What is this? A center for ants? How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the building?"

Crazy Games

I heard about this video today and it sounded interesting. The concept is simple: 6 guys get together in a library and if they lose the card draw, they have to do something bad but because its a library, they can't make any noise. I couldn't stop laughing at their pain.

Silent Library

Another Congratulations!

Congratulations to Rodney and Jeanette on the birth of the new son. I've known both of them all my life and they've both come a long way.

Congratulations Andre & Deanna

I know what you're thinking, "Why don't you put a picture of the newlyweds?" I explained this before. It's my blog and I'm gonna put pictures of me at the wedding. If you want to see pictures of the newlyweds, go to their website. No, I don't know the address to their site so maybe ask them for it yourself. Do I look like a freakin internet tour guide? Anyway, congratulations to Andre and Deanna. Their wedding was a lot of fun with a more than a few funny stories. I'll tell one of them later if I remember. I swear you'll laugh your ass off. It was that funny.

Fireball!!

Last night Celia's cousin was in town. We went out for a nice dinner, had a few drinks, and hit some club. We also met his friend who is a bit of a movie star. Don't get me wrong, he's not like Bruce Willis: Movie Star or Johnny Depp: Movie Star, he's more like "that guy that was in the movie with Mark Wahlberg". Anyway, if you saw him you'd probably recognize a couple of movies he was in. He was in Catwoman, The Corruptor, and most importantly he played Ryu in the Street Fighter movie. As we were sitting in the bar having drinks I could only think one thing: "Man, Ryu could totally take Guile in a fight." And I had to stop myself from asking him, "Okay, seriously now, seriously. Did you ever hit it with Chun-Li?" All kidding aside, he was a really nice guy except I think he was trying hit on Celia.

Ryu: "So Celia, what do you do?"
Celia: "Oh, I work in real estate development."
Ryu: "That's interesting, how do you like it?"
Oliver: "I'm a nurse."
Ryu: "So what development are you working on now."
Celia: "I'm at UBC."
Ryu: "There's a lot of new development there."
Oliver: "I'm a nurse."
Ryu: "In fact, I have some family that lives in one of your company's developements."
Celia: "Oh, which one?"
Oliver: "I'm a nurse."
etc etc...

Okay, I'm just kidding, it didn't really go like that. He didn't totally ignore me, in all fairness I was sitting behind Celia in a slightly lower chair so he probably could barely hear or see me except when I was poking my head over her shoulder. Really nice guy though.

For Sale

Does anyone want to buy this chair?
$30

Call me if you want it.

Weather Update

Well it finally cooled off and I can now turn my computer on. Because our computers are in the room that gets the afternoon sun, and last week it was hotter than Britney Spears before Special K-Fed, we turned them off and didn't even go into the room except in the early morning. Well now that the temp has come down to a reasonable level I've been able to waste all kinds of time on the internet, playing games, and wasting a lot of time on my computer. Finally!

In honour of the hot weather, here's the best ice cream place in all of Canada:



If you know where it is, you're a lucky lucky person. If you've been there you're luckier than Keira Knightley's underwear drawer.

Like I Lake You

Last week I went to Buntzen Lake with some of my friends from work. The original plan was for only 5 or 6 of us to go but we decided that we'd invite everyone in the department (about 30 people). The day came and early in the morning we went to the lake and you know how many people showed up? Six. Just like the original plan. Anyway, it was a good time and a fun way to cool off during the hot hot hot weather.

(Not so)New Revelations

There's a few things I've realized:

1. I'll never get 10,000 hits by Christmas
2. I'm not as young as I like to think
3. I'm fat and really out of shape
4. CSI:Miami isn't so bad (I still like LV the best)
5. I heart summer

Okay, I know some of it isn't new (#3) but with the hot weather and a lot of time spent at home, these things came to mind.

Finally

We got our barbeque yesterday! It's pretty freakin nice and the best part of it is that it was free. We got it with points so we didn't pay anything. Celia called me at work yesterday and says she just got a call from the company and they just delivered the barbeque but no one was home so they left it at the front door. When I got home, I saw it and realized why they weren't afraid of anyone stealing it. This thing came in a cardboard box bigger than Kevin Federline's old house. Y'know those wooden pallets that things ship on? This barbeque came on one of those and it was sitting there blocking my whole driveway. I had to open it and take it to the back patio one piece at a time. We bought a propane tank, some meat, and tonight we're firing it up! w00t!! Everyone's welcome, bring your own beer and meat.

Deep Thoughts

In the middle of this heat wave, I only have one thougth going through my head. "Holy shit its hot."

The New Reality

Canadian Idol, Hell's Kitchen, and So You Think You Can Dance? I still haven't found my favourite Canadian Idol yet, but soon... Soon. I've haven't watched Hell's Kitchen in a while and SYTYCD is taking forever. I guess I'm not as big of a fan that I thought.

Yay Italy

Well its been a couple of days and I gotta tell you: I think soccer is kinda boring. The excitement of the crowd is more interesting than the game. I know its the most-watched sport in the world but all that running back and forth is dull. Don't be mad at me, I'm a nerd.

Life... for Dummies

Y'know those yellow books about everything... for dummies? And the old Coles Notes for all the books you didn't bother to read in school? I used to think these things were great. They taught you everything you needed to know but didn't want to bother to really learn. If you didn't understand the language or terminology, these books put it into everyday english. Great, huh? Maybe its my old age, but now I'm starting to think these books do nothing but breed mediocrity. Need to learn something quick because you didn't start early enough? Have to write a paper but you don't want to read the source material? Want to learn about computers but don't understand how they work? Poetry... for dummies, The Great Gatsby... for dummies, Computers... for dummies. I'm not really good when it comes to literature, or math, or sports but I do know my own profession and career. Would you want a nurse that got through school with a 100-page booklet called Nursing... for dummies? How would you feel if you saw your pharmacist reading Pharmacology... for dummies? Now you're thinking, "That's different. I wouldn't use those books for that. Just the simple things like how to edit a photo on my computer." I totally agree with you, but that's what the nurse or pharmacist said until they started running out of time to do homework.

What's my point? Study! Learn! Don't be a dumbass!

Stuff I Like

I like crosswords. I just print it off. I have a tonne of them now. I think I told you that, but here's where I get my crosswords from:

The Star Crossword Challenge


Want some dark humour? Want some sick and twisted humour? Check this out daily:

Cyanide and Happiness

Wiki- What?

If you haven't heard of it yet, check out Wikipedia for "research". Why do I put quotes around research? Well Wikipidia is a free, online encyclopedia that is created by user input. So I wouldn't recommend writing your master's thesis based on Wikipedia info, but if you're just looking for a little more info on Mt. Pinatubo or who Deep Throat is for interest's sake, check it out. It's hipper than the Peach Pit After Dark.

Have Some More

My property tax is due today. Tough shit, I'm gonna pay it on Tuesday. Eat me, taxman.

Turn Turn Turn

I turned the bed the other night. I mean I physically turned it 90 degrees counter clockwise. Now the head of the bed is under the window and the room feels like it has more space. If you have any feng shui comments, keep that shit to yourself - I don't want to hear it. There's nothing wrong with having the bed under the window. Its actually quite refreshing at night and when you wake up you feel like you're on vacation because the room looks different like you're in a hotel.

That New Car Smell

No, I'm not referring some abstract idea of something new in life and how you can always tell its new. Also, I'm not referring to how smell helps you remember things better than any other sense. I'm just talking about that New Car smell. It especially smells good when it's an Acura CSX with the leather seats. Ya, that smells way better than my car...

Movie Review

Superman with Brandon Routh and Kate Bosworth

Cool shit man.

Not Now, Later.

How would you put off procrastinating till later? I was watching Ellen and she made a good point. In today's day and age, we have all kinds of technology to save time. Devices and gadgets that let us do more at once so we have more time for later. Well, since I have a short attention span and I like immediate gratification, I don't want more time later, I want more time now. So, rather than get things done faster to save time later, which may or may not happen because we can't predict the future anyway, I'll procrastinate and more time now and rush later - which I might not have to do anyway.

Movie Review

Jarhead with Jake Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard

Not bad. There's too many fucking A's in their names.

Tough

I like to complain. I won't deny it, I like to complain about everything. I'll be all sarcastic and make all kinds of smart-ass comments, but really, I just like to complain. I need to voice every thought in my head about how inconvenient of out-of-the-way what ever the situation is. My complaining, however, does not mean I'm not willing to try it. When the time comes, I'll go with the situation and I'll try not to bring the world world down with me. I'm usually pretty easy-going but damn it, I just have to comment on it as I go. So when I'm complaining, just say "Tough for you" and ignore the rest of my stupid comments.

Wake Up!!

For my birthday, I got an iHome clock radio with an iPod dock. Believe me, this thing is great. The only problem I have with it is that the buzzer isn't loud enough to wake me up. My old alarm clock had a buzzer that woke up my grandmother in the Philippines. This new one has one of those "gentle alarms" that progressively gets louder but not loud enough to jolt me awake the way I like. I shouldn't complain because it does wake me up eventually and I haven't slept in yet, but I'm worried about that one day when I have to be somewhere really early and I sleep through the alarm. I just have to keep telling myself, "it'll work, it'll work..."

Working Hard, Hardly Working

My job is getting harder and harder. I've been there for 2 years now and I find myself with more and more responsibilities. I mean, that's great and all, but now I get contacted for all kinds of things that I don't want to deal with. I just want to go to work, put my feet up and relax. Is that too much to ask for? A couple of months ago, I was asked by my boss to lead some major testing sessions. I seem to have taken over the design and management of our intranet site, and now I'm being volunteered to go to a union meeting to represent our department and explain what we do and how we're important to our profession. Some of these things are interesting, but like I said, I just want my easy job back.

High Tech & Useless

When I went to the conference in Florida last week, I was wandering around the vendor floor picking up little bits of swag. At one booth, the sales guy gave me a little USB memory key. Not such a big deal nowadays except this one has a fingerprint reader! How cool is that (in a BillGates-nerdy sort of way)! I took it home, set the thing to read my fingerprint but then realized it'll only work on computers that have the software installed on them. Stupid.

Movie Review

X-Men 3: The Last Stand with Famke Jansen, Halle Berry, Ian McKellen, and Hugh Jackman

Good shit. I liked the second one better. People die in this one.

Good PR is Important

We had a meeting with our union today about being on-call 24/7. Except for a few little details, everything seems to be in order so it looks like we'll be on call all the time now. No big deal to me, its easy money and we generally don't get many calls. Anyway, after the meeting we were talking to the union reps and I somehow got conned into going to one of their meetings to give a little presentation on what we do and why nurses are working in Information Management. Its not until September so I have a lot of time to prepare. Doesn't sound like such a big deal, but since I'm such a shy person I get nervous about this stuff.

Quick Summary

Favourite ride in DisneyWorld: Aerosmith's Rockin' Rollercoaster - indoors, fast, & upside down
Least favourite ride in DisneyWorld: MGM Backlot Tour - nothing to see, boring trivia
Favourite park in DisneyWorld: MGM Studios - best rides, best stores
Least favourite park in disneyWorld: Magic Kingdom - boring, just for kids

Top 4 rides:
1. Rockin' Rollercoaster
2. Tower of Terror
3. Expedition Everest
4. Space Mountain
Everything else is just okay.

Happy Birthday to Me

Yesterday was my birthday. I didn't do anything special. In fact, I didn't do anything at all. I stayed at home most of the day trying to do laundry and get all my stuff from my trip organized. Then I went to my sister-in-law-in-law's birthday (we share the same birthday) and then went out for Pho. For the rest of the evening, we watched Grey's Anatomy and then went to bed. My 32nd came and went without a bang.

There once was a guy named Oliver,
He wasn't well known as a lover.
He landed a chick,
And oh what a kick.
He was in love, yes, with all of her.

There once was a guy from Saskatchewan,
Who... oh crap, what the hell rhymes with "Saskatchewan"?

The Happiest Celebration on Earth

Well, I'm back from my conference in Florida. The conference itself was pretty good. A lot of interesting stuff. However, out of the 5 days I spent there, the conference only took up the mornings and first half of the afternoon. The rest of the time was spent in the various parks at Disney World. Animal Kingdom, Magic Kingdom, MGM Studios, Epcot, and Downtown Disney. It was a lot of fun but I don't think its the kind of place I would go to again unless I had kids.

Away Again.

Off to Florida! See you in a week.

Back to Normal

Twice I've gone downstairs expecting to see Shaughn sitting at the bottom of the stairs. For the past 2 weeks every time I go down he jumped up and followed me around the house expecting me to either feed him or take him outside. Brenda and Peter picked him up less than an hour ago to take him home. I kinda got used to having him around. He's a lot of work though. I've been waking up early to feed him and take him outside. Celia says I didn't have to wake up so early and that I'm just a worrywart about the whole thing. He was a good roommate while he was here but it will be nice to see the rug again without all the dog hair.

Wedding

Yesterday was Brenda and Peter's wedding reception. They got married on the cruise ship last week and their reception was at the UBC Golf Course. It was very nice and the food was pretty good. Celia's sister, parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, and old friends were in town from all over the world. I met her dad for the first time, I danced the sprinkler with her mom, and I made gift boxes with her sister and cousin. It was a full week. Anyhoo, they're here for a couple more days, but I'm leaving tomorrow so I won't see them again for a while.

Movie Review

Mission: Impossible 3 with Tom Cruise, Keri Russel, & Maggie Q

Who the hell is Maggie Q? Does she not have a real name? I read that the Q stands for Quigley or something like that. She looks pretty hot in the movie and drives a sweet car. The rest of the movie was okay.

OSN - Oliver's Sports Network

I'm not going to make fun of Ultimate. Seriously, I won't make fun of it. I mean, really, it was a brilliant idea to combine football with a frisbee. Pardon me, it's not a frisbee, it's a "disc". What better way to enjoy a sunny day at the park than to throw your disc around with your friends? The guy (or girl - no discrimination here) that invented this game was a genius. Then, to make it sound like one of those "extreme" sports, he (or she) named the game "Ultimate". There's, like, teams and leagues and tournaments and stuff for this game. I'm not making fun of the game. In fact, I'm the last person who should be making fun of any kind of physical activity. I mean cuz I've gained a lot of weight and I'm really out of shape. Maybe playing a little Ultimate would be good for me. Help me shed a few pounds. Get me out in the sun for a bit of a tan. Help me make new friends and... okay I can't do it any more. Ultimate is so lame.

"Combining the non-stop movement and athletic endurance of soccer with the aerial passing skills of football, a game of Ultimate is played by two seven-player squads with a high-tech plastic disc on a field similar to football."

"high-tech plastic disc"?? Its a fucking frisbee!! Frisbees are not high-tech. They've been around for decades!

Early Riser

I've been waking up at 6am every day since Saturday so that I could take the dog out for a walk. Seriously, I've never woken up that early for more than 2 or 3 days in a row. The dog is so hyper about going out first thing in the morning I feel bad if I take him out after 7am. He's had to hold his pee all night (so did I though) and I'm sure he's gotta go real bad. And since I don't want any 'accidents' in the house, I take him out 3 or 4 or 5 times/day. Actually, I go out for my own sake as well. No, I don't go out and pee in the bushes, but I do like walking around the block with the dog. It's a bit of exercise for the dog and for me as well.

Special Day

Happy Mother's Day to all you moms out there!

Funny Funny Shit

The Dog

While Celia is away, I'm dog-sitting Shaughn. He's the dog I talked about last year that had a pretty bad seizure. He still doesn't walk too straight and he's kinda clumsy around the house but he's still a good dog. I'll have him at home for the next week. I hope he's good. :)

Inspiration

This past week has been Nurse's Week. So the next time you see a nurse, give him hug and tell him he's your inspiration.

Lost

No, not the TV show. People keep talking about it - about how great it is and how addicting it is. I've never watched it but it looks interesting. Maybe someday I'll download it (in a completely legal manner wtih all copyright laws intact). Anyhoo, I'm talking about lost socks. I was reading a blog about things that go missing and it made me think about my socks. When I lived at home I just figured I had dropped a sock somewhere and someone else picked it up. When I moved out I would do my laundry and one fucking sock was still missing! I guess you just have make a sacrifice to the laundry gods and give up the sock.

Another Movie Review

Aeon Flux with Charlize Theron

Lame.

American Idol

Eliot has to go, Katharine is hot, Paris is annoying, Taylor has heart, and Chris is gonna win.

Movie Reviews

Crash with Don Cheadle, Sandra Bullock, Matt Dillon, and Ryan Phillipe

No wonder this move won. It was fucking great. Someday I'll give my 2 cents about racism. I just don't feel like talking all deep right now.

Mission: Impossible 3 with Tom Cruise and Felicity

For Tom's sake, this movie better kick ass.

Happy Birthday VJ

There once was a man from Moose Jaw,
He liked his beer cold and his fish raw.
He found a good spouse,
and built a big house,
Let's hope he doesn't have problems with the law.

Happy Birthday VJ. We've been friends for over 30 years. Here's to another 30 (at least)!!

When's Your Birthday?

If you tell me your birthday, I'll write you a bad poem.

Happy Birthday Kerri

I wrote you a birthday poem:

There once was a girl from Saskatoon,
She would laugh and laugh like a loon.
But then she moved here,
And discovered some beer,
Now she parties all night and sleeps till noon!

Okay okay, she doesn't really drink beer and I doubt she sleeps till noon or parties all night. But she is a lot of fun to hang out with. Happy birthday!

I'm Walking the Plank

The other day I bought a DVD burner. I've held off on buying one because, really, what the hell am I going to burn onto a DVD that I can't burn onto a CD? I buy my movies because I like to have the orignal case (I like the way it looks on my bookshelf) and none of my CD players can read DVDs for music. Then again, I don't burn music anymore because of my iPod. Then I realized that I could burn TV shows and crap like that onto DVDs. So now I'm putting episodes of my legally aquired, high-definition TV series onto DVDs so I can watch them on my humongous TV instead of my itty bitty computer monitor. This is cheaper than buying a humongous computer monitor. Okay, I'm lying. My TV isn't humongous and my computer monitor isn't itty bitty. Is there anything else I can burn onto DVDs?

Grrr

Ignorant

Work is Fun

My boss sent out an email and I couldn't help but laugh at it.

"Hi everyone - as we discussed last week the open house is on May 26. Please ensure any extra items (i.e. blow up snowman, sand, pale and shovel, cob webs, safari hats, etc.) are tidied up for the day. After the open house - it's every man / woman for himself again. "

As you can tell, we have a lot of fun at work. In 2 weeks we're having a minigolf tournament in the office (ie, in the cubicle maze) as a fundraiser. We're setting up holes around the office so people can walk around and get to know everyone else (there's about 200 people in our office space).

The Advantages of Being a Male Nurse

On Friday night when I was working, I had a patient call in the middle of the night. When I got in the room she says she wants me to get "the girl nurse". Okay, fine by me. I went and got my friend Elaine to go in and see what she wanted. As it turns out, she was incontinent and needed her diaper changed. I wasn't there to see it, but apparently it was pretty gross. Generally speaking, you can't pick and choose your nurse. Whoever is there is who you get. Sorry, that's just the way it is. If you want to choose your own nurse, go hire a private nurse and go home. With this said, however, I hardly ever argue with my patients about this. Usually it means they needs something really personal done - like clean up a whole pile of shit - and I'm not one to fight for this job. I should apologize to my coworkers that I pull this on them but, hey, its not my fault some people think only women should be nurses.

Damn Me and My Big Mouth

I know its black text on a dark gray background, but my site meter is at the bottom of the archive list. If you can't read it, dude, get a better monitor. I'm just short of 4700 hits now. That means I need 5300 hits over the next 8 months. Crap, why did I have to set unrealistic goals and then shoot my mouth off about it. Check this out to see why I'm a loser.

Everybody Has a Story Part 8

Last night I picked up another shift at the hospital. I had a patient that was still relatively young (54 yrs old) with a broken hip. "54? That's pretty young for a broken hip," I thought. Reading into it a little more, I saw that the docs thought this too and did a few more tests. As it turns out, he had bone cancer. From what I hear, this form of cancer is one of the more painful ones. He had just found out from his doc earlier in the day and last night he didn't fall asleep until about 5am. Nice guy, too. When I see things like this, I just can't help but think, "Man, that really sucks."

Goals

My goal is to get 10,000 hits by the end of the year. I'm not going to visit my own site more often just to reach my goal, but I'll advertise it a little more. Starting now.


Visit my site!

Metro-man

Yesterday Celia and her friends had a spa night here. All the manicures, pedicures, waxing, and massaging got me thinking: maybe I should get some work done. Manicures and pedicures, I find, are a little... frivolous for me. Massages I'll pass on - they just don't do anything for me. I'm not going to wax anything but I was thinking about getting a facial. I'm very self-conscious about my skin. Its looking uneven and a little rough. If I get a facial once, will I always need/want one after? Can I do a one-time job or do I have to keep up with regular maintenance? I don't expect miracles or anything and I don't expect it permanently fix my face, but if it helps a little once, that's all I want. Next time they have a spa night, I'm getting down with that.

Follow-up Review

iPod. Generation 5 also known as the Video iPod. After having this for about a month, I thought I'd let you all know what I think about it. All comments are made using the iPod Mini as a point of reference. Navigating with the Video iPod is a little slower and the battery dies a little faster. Mind you, the battery issue isn't a big deal because I plug it in every 3 or 4 days. I use my iPod all day at work (when I'm at my desk) and 3 or 4 days is still pretty good as far as I'm concerned. Besides, its a tradeoff for the big, bright, colour screen. Navigation is a little slower but again, I just got used to it and now I barely notice. I don't need a perfect mp3 player, I just want one that I think looks nice and does what I want it to do. My beautiful black iPod gets an 8/10.

Mr. HandyMan

I helped Jeff put together his new barbeque. It wasn't so hard, just a lot of pieces to screw together. I really liked how the instructions would say, "if gas valve connection does not fit correctly, explosion may result." Well, that didn't sound so good but I think we got it right. Jeff and I decided that this summer we'd have a bbq. I'd invite everyone, but it's not my house. Oh what the hell, come anyway. Just bring beer, your own meat, and a little salad or something to share. I'll tell Jeff you're coming, but call when you're on your way...

Long Weekend

Happy Easter!

Theme Night

I haven't been to a club in a long time. Okay, it was just a month or two ago, so let me clarify. I haven't been to AuBar in a long time. I never thought this club was that great to begin with, but it was Denise's birthday and one of her friends was organizing the evening. For the most part, I had a good time but see, the thing is, when I'm at a club I like to people watch. I like to see how these drunk people are interacting with each other and the people around them. I like to laugh at how some loser dude buys drinks for a girl just so he can make out with a drunk chick later in the night. I like to shake my head at the guys that dance behind some girls without the girl knowing and pretend that he's dancing with her. I also like to watch the beautiful people come and go. The well-dressed, well-groomed, well-mannered people. Well, let me tell you something. Other than the group I was with, Saturday night at the AuBar is Ugly Night. Yes, I would almost go so far as to say fugly. If you were there and you're offended now, you should have either walked past me to prove me wrong or hid in the shadows a little better.

Natural Evolution

Last year I bought a silver iPod Mini. I chose the iPod over other mp3 players because it looked good, it was easy to use, and it was just cool to have. Also, the iPod was supposed to change the way I listened to music. Well, I gotta tell ya, I still listen to music the same way but now I carry a lot more of it with me than I ever have. I use it at work a lot sitting in front of my computer. I even bought some cheap-o speakers for work for when I don't want to use the headphones (or earbuds or whatever the hell you call them). Now, after a year, in the interest of evolution and Darwinian theory, I've gotten rid of the old iPod Mini and upgraded to the Video iPod. Okay, not exactly Darwinian Evolutionary Theory, but the new video iPod is pretty fucking sweet. I've even started downloading video podcasts. I'm not going to give you a big review on the iPod, I'm just gonna say, if you're gonna get an iPod, screw the Shuffle, screw the Nano. Get the Big One.

3 Simple Rules

I really like crossword puzzles. Call me a nerd, call me a geek, just don't call me while I'm working on my crossword puzzles. There are some simple rules I follow:

1. I use a pen, never a pencil.
2. I never look at the answers while working on a puzzle.
3. I don't like having other people help me unless I ask.

Why all the rules? Working on the puzzle is a challenge and having the option of erasing answers or having the answers nearby or using someone else's brainpower is like cheating.

Things That Make You Go Hmm... Part 2

1. Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"?
2. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
3. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too?
4. If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff?
5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
7. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
8. If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
9. Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
10. If God dropped acid, would he see people?
11. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
12. If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times, does he become disoriented?
13. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
14. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
15. Is there another word for synonym?
16. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
17. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
18. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
19. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
20. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"

After it All...

Who watched the Olympics? Did anyone flip to CBC and watch one event for like, 2 hours? And in that 2 hours, did you become an expert in that sport? I was watching luge once for about 10 minutes and I suddenly became an expert judge and coach. "Ooo, good positioning. Nice and flat on the sled, barely raising his head." During the summer Olympics I'm usually an expert on diving. Especially synchronized diving.

Lookalikes

VJ, Alexa and I were talking about this a couple weeks ago. Who else thinks Celia looks like a young Sandra Oh?

Who's Da Man?

Wow, in the past 8 months, I've had 4000 visitors to my blogsite. Granted, its probably the same people reading it on a somewhat regular basis. Plus I visit my own site so I can read the comments that people leave. I've been checking the stats on my site meter and there are people from all over North America, Asia, Europe, and one person from Africa that have visited my site. Weird. Now they know all kinds of crap about me. Its a good thing I didn't use my real name in the url. I'm guessing they came across it in with that "next blog" thing in the corner. I did a search once for something and one of the search hits was my own blog because I had the search word in the title of one of my entries. That's just crazy. I'm totally feeling like the man now cuz I'm so damn popular. Four THOUSAND. That's 500/month or about 17/day. God, I'm a egotistic jerk...

Everybody Has a Story Part 7

Last week I worked on the ward. We had to do a patient swap with another hospital and the new patient we got was a 40-something-old man that just had surgery on his ankle. Not a huge surgery but still pretty painful. The thing about getting patients from other hospitals is that we can't do anything until one of the docs at our hospital comes and sees the patient and writes orders. The doc we were waiting for was stuck in emerg so she was a little late seeing the patient. Normally, this isn't a big deal except the guy needed some pain medication. He was pretty pissed that he couldn't get anything especially since at the other hospital he was well pain-controlled. After a little over an hour I decided, "screw this, I'm going to give him the same pain-killers he was getting at the other hospital." even though he wasn't even my patient. This is kinda frowned on cuz I'm giving medication without a doctor's order, but I kinda knew the doc we were waiting for and I was pretty sure she would just order the same thing anyway. So I gave it to him and then left him alone to cool off and to let the medication kick in. A couple hours later I went in to see him and he was feeling much better and was in a better mood. He apologized for losing his temper and thanked me for helping him out. It turned out to be a good shift for me.

Milestones

No, not the restaurant even if they make a great steak. I'm approaching my 4000th visitor (and I don't mean I've gotten my period 4000 times - I'm a guy, I don't menstruate) and I'm going to celebrate. If you're reading this and you scroll down a bit, check if you're #4000. If you are and you send me a picture, I'll post whatever picture you send me. Unless its a picture of me doing something really embarrassing. Keep in mind that I get final say in all entries. If I get more than one entry, than one of you bastards are lying and I'm not going to post anything.

TV Series Review

This is a new first for me.

Grey's Anatomy with Ellen Pompeo, Sandra Oh, Katherine Heigl and a bunch of dudes

This is a great show. I especially like how they always tell each other about interesting patients and they go running to see it for themselves.

Back in the Saddle

On Saturday I picked up a shift at the hospital. Its so weird going back there. Half the people I used to work with are all gone and there are a tonne of new grads hanging out. Back in my bedside days I would have been bossing them all around but now I'm asking them things like, "how do I fill out this new form?" and "where do you guys keep the heparin?" I felt like a new grad. Its fun though, to go back and work with patients again. The bunch that I had were really good. I got to make a few jokes with them, we made some progress in their care, told a few stories, and still got a lot done. It almost makes me miss working on the ward. Almost. I still wouldn't go back full-time unless I absolutely had to.

Pet Peeve: when I tell people I have a desk job and they ask, "So you're not a nurse anymore?" Get your minds out of that little tiny tunnel! Just because I'm not wiping someone's ass doesn't mean I'm not a nurse. You should be asking this: "So what area of nursing does that fall under?" or better yet, say "Sweet, dude. So you don't come home stinking like someone else's shit anymore."

Busy

I always know when I'm getting really busy at work because when I get home, I can't seem to write in my blog. Right now, I'm working on a couple of different projects at once. It's great cuz it keeps me busy but it sux because now I'm working my ass off without feeling like I'm getting anywhere. Oh well. I think I work a little better when I'm really busy. Or maybe I don't and its all in my head.

Last week I went to Cypress on Monday night. It was great! Even though the runs were all groomed and there was no fresh powder, it was still pretty soft (compared to night boarding last year).

Hmm...

1. When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
2. When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
3. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted?
4. When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
5. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
6. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
7. What if there were no hypothetical questions?
8. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
9. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
10. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
11. I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
12. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
13. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
14. I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.
15. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
16. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
17. Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
18. Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
19. I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
20. Why is the man (or woman) who invests all your money called a broker?
21. At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
22. The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

Movie Reviews

40 Year Old Virgin with Steve Carrell and Paul Rudd

Funny, funny shit.


The Dukes of Hazzard with Johnny Knoxville, Sean William Scott, and Jessica Simpson

It sucked.

Book Review

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

A real heartwearming, tearjerking, smile-to-your-face-while-you're-crying kinda book. It was okay. If you like to get slapped in the face with meaning of life shit. I like stories with a bit more subtlety. If you ask me face-to-face how the book was, I'll throw it at you and say "did you like that? If you did, you might like the book."

Inadequate

I was reading the Cypress Mountain website and there is a shitload of snow up there. It just keeps snowing. Then I read: "good mountain tires are required". Oh crap. I don't have good summer tires! Can someone please drive me to Cypress Mountain?

It's Nice to be Home

While I was in the Philippines, I realized that I was spending a lot of time with my parents. Since I moved (almost 4 years ago), this was the most I've seen them at one time. Three weeks of mom and dad. Nice at times, but frustrating at the same time. Am I a bad kid?

What's a 4-Letter Word You Say When You're Frustrated?

I'm addicted to crossword puzzles. I used to cut them out of newspapers (or rip the page out of papers I find a Starbucks) but now I just go online and print them off. During my 14 hour flight to the Philippines I had a stack of about 30 of them. When I came home I only had about 3 or 4 left. My goal is to finish them, but I usually have a handfull of squares left. I always hate the ones where you're only missing one letter but you still can't seem to fill it in. Argh!

Sex and the City

I watch this show whenever its on TV and have been for the past 5 months. Its not really my idea to do this. Celia makes me. I don't know why she asks me what I want to watch, cuz I know what we're going to watch. I've seen just about every episode and I know almost all the stories. I actually find the show funny and it has some pretty damn witty jokes. If you've never seen the show, here's a quick rundown:

Samantha: the slut. she'll sleep with anyone.
Miranda: the "liberated" powerful lawyer. she is, however, a little insecure.
Charlotte: the smart but ditzy romantic. she's the spoiled rich girl.
Carrie: she's the one that keeps them all together.

If you watch the uncensored shows, you'll see everyone's boobs except Carrie's. Strange that I thought of that...

All Self-Centered Dorks Raise Your Hand

Okay, I'm a nosy geek. I added a sitemeter at the bottom of my blog to see how many hits I get. Right now I'm at about 3500 since the end of June. Sure, it helps my ego and all, but it also lets me see who is reading my blog at any given time. I don't mean that I know who exactly is reading it (ie, your name and address - but I do know that about some people). I mean I can see that someone from Konglungen, Akershus, Norway was reading my blog on January 14th at 6:14pm, using Internet Explorer 6.0 on Windows XP at a resolution of 1024x768 and their ISP was NextGenTel AS. I can tell they were reading and didn't just accidentally click on it and then leave because they spent 8 minutes on my blogpage. Creepy, huh? I'm just the kind of freak that would look at this information too.

I'm always amazed when I find out someone reads my blog. My friend at work (hi Rene and no, I don't care about your anonymity) mentioned something to me about something I had written in my blog recently. I knew she read it, but I had forgotten so when she said it I was thinking, "How the hell did you know that?" Then my ego kinda got all inflated and shit cuz I then I thought I was the most interesting guy in the world. God, I'm a dork.

Movie & Book Review

This is my first combo review.

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden &
Memoirs of a Geisha with Ziyi Zhang, Michelle Yeoh and Gong Li

The book is always better but the movie was pretty good too. The 3 main actors are hot. I read the book while I was on vacation. I didn't care that the movie didn't have Japanese actors. Good read, good movie.

Things I've Learned in Life

1. I don't know about you, but when you're swimming in the ocean when you're totally drunk, it really helps sober you up.
2. Save all your change. Then, after a couple of years, roll it up and take it to the bank. I did that and I bought 2 iPod minis with extended warranties.
3. Always drink Tequila at the end of the night. That way, when you're throwing up, you don't blame the beer.
4. A good keyboard and mouse makes the difference between "just a computer" and a "cool-looking computer" (I'm a nerd).
5. Coke is better than Pepsi. Jeff might disagree, but the entire population of the Philippines will back me up.
6. Smoking, apparently, is bad for you.
7. If you walk around the house naked, you should close your blinds. Its just polite. Unless you're a woman, then its okay.

Pros and Cons

One good thing about a long haul flight is that the drinks are free and you can watch 4 or 5 movies in a row. The bad thing is that sometimes the movies suck and there's always a lineup for the crappy bathrooms. Then there's always the risk of developing a DVT if you don't get up from your seat. Of course if you have enough to drink, you're up peeing all the time anyway. Maybe I should fly business class instead of economy.

That's Just What You Do on Vacation

I'm not really a big drinker. I'll have one or two but that's usually it. When I was in the Phils, there were more than a couple of nights when I had a little more than one or two drinks. I think I averaged about 6 or 7. On my last night in Boracay I think I had 7 beers (good old San Mig Light) and 2 double shots of tequila. Then we all went swimming in the ocean fully dressed (just shorts and t-shirts anyway). That night ended at about 6:30am. On my last night there, we went out and I "only" had 5 drinks but we were out until 4:30am. I was going to get picked up to go to the airport at 6am. Good think I already packed.

Congratulations

Congratulations to my cousin. He got married on January 7th. It was beautiful outdoor reception in the Philippines.

First Thoughts

Getting off the plane in Manila, I was bombarded with quite a few sensations. The first one is always "it smells like the Philippines." I guess its the smog. Then its "its hot." Well, it is a tropical country after all. Driving to my relatives' house, I get the "it looks dirty and poor". With almost 80million people, any third world country would look that way. I really enjoy going back to the Philippines and I think I always will.

Home is Where the Heart Is

I actually discovered this the last couple of times I was in the Philippines but I've often wondered where I "belong". Here in Canada I'm a visible minority (maybe not so much here in Vancouver, but you know what I mean). I'm not white, I have cultural differences that make themselves evident in weddings, funerals, home life, and personal values, and my family speaks a foreign language. Growing up in a predominantly white society in the prairies, I never really felt like I fit in. Then, when I was 26 I went to the Philippines. My parents still call it "going home" and I tell people that it's "where I'm from". However, when I'm there I still don't quite fit in. I may not stand out in a crowd, but the locals can still tell that I'm not from there, I don't speak the language, and I don't fully understand some cultural idiosyncracies. So "going home" wasn't an experience that was familiar to me. Over the past few years, I've come to the realization that home isn't necessarily where you were born or where your family originated from. It also may not be where you currently live. Home, as they say, is where the heart is, and today I came home.

Home Sweet Home

After a 1.5hr flight from Manila to Hong Kong and an 11hr flight from Hong Kong to Vancouver, I'm home! I have so much to say about the Philippines but I won't write one big entry about it. No one likes to read long paragraphs about stuff like that. You'll just have to put up with me talking about it for a long time. Have fun.